Once there was a man whose beloved wife was transformed from the charming girl he had married into a sodden drunkard. He was always angry and frustrated because he couldn't make her stop drinking. The more he tried, the worse she felt about it, thus, the more she drank. She was full of guilt and self-reproach because she left everything to him. He had to get the children ready for school, do the shopping, cook meals and clean house.
Then one day somebody told him about Al-Anon and other groups that give support in intervention. Although he felt his case was hopeless, he thought he'd try it anyway. As he read, asked question, and listened at meetings, he found he could get some perspective on his problems.
He stopped blaming himself for not being able to control his wife. He realized the children resented him because he was often cross and unreasonable, and that they loved their mama because she never scolded and they knew instinctively she was sick.
The husband and father began to consider his own needs for rest, quiet, and a bit of recreation. He arranged to have a housekeeper take over the home chores. He made many changes, but especially in his attitude toward his alcoholic wife.
After a spell of rebellion and resistance, she saw that she would have to get help.
(Note: This story, in all its aspects, has absolute relevance to how we respond in a healthy way to all dysfunctional family members in the Parent Team Intervention Program.)
[Taken and fashioned from "One Dat At A Time In Al-Anon"
for general family relationships by Jim Hogue, MA, MFTI]
No comments:
Post a Comment