During World War II six Navy pilots left their aircraft carrier on a mission. After searching the seas for enemy submarines, they tried to return to their ship shortly after dark. But the captain had ordered a blackout of all lights on the ship. Over and over the frantic pilots radioed, asking for just one light so they could see to land. But the pilots were told that the blackout could not be lifted. After several appeals and denials of their request, the ship's operator turned the switch to break radio contact--and the pilots were forced to ditch in the ocean. As parents of children who often give trouble in their trek to adulthood, it is easy to feel hurt, unappreciated and lose hope. In the "PTI Program" we know and use the value of "team intervention" with a group of fellow parents and professionals to change our kids' harmful activity. With the principles and procedures we utilize, a renewal of hope and success in changing the behaviors of our children ensue. Yet, quite often, the process includes we parents letting go of our past doubt, fear and bitterness as the young ones in our families return to honoring and seeking our parental guidance.
I've seen it so often that, through calculated team-intervention, I know children will return to their proper healthy state if each parent will remain strong through decisions of reasonable consequences and management teamwork. However, when our children begin their path of healing, demonstrated by observable changes in behavior and decision making, let us be certain to let go of our past pain and resentment for how they harmed us. In the process, our children will be like "planes flying through the night, circling back seeking the ships they left for landing in safety."
Remember, no matter what, keep loving your child. Be strong as a father or mother, hold to what is right, but never give up cherishing the beauty inside your son or daughter.
[Written by Jim Hogue, MA, MFTI /
Supervisor: Peter Mosgofian, MA, MFTI ]
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