*September 1st*

When our problems enclose us and saturate our thoughts, we find ourselves in an isolation that gives us an acute sense of loneliness. We may confide in friends, but underneath we feel nobody understands what we are going through.

Dwelling on our troubles only shuts out a world that is waiting to be enjoyed. Nothing has real power to deprive us of the delights to be found in many daily experiences - even a routine household or outside employment job duty. For those of us who have children in our care, we can forget our troubles in devoting loving attention to them and their development. Observing our children is like reading a fascinating and often amusing book!

Today's Reminder
I may have big troubles, but I can, if I wish, make those troubles less painful by turning my thoughts to happier things. I will not isolate myself in my problems. I will observe and enjoy what is good and pleasant in the world around me.

"Let me not deprive myself of the many little joys that are mine for the taking."

[Taken from "One Day At A Time In Al-Anon"
for general family relationships by Jim Hogue, MA, MFTI

*August 31*

"It's a nice day," people say when the weather's fine. One of the things taught in Al-Anon is that the kind of a day it is does not depend on the weather, but on our attitudes and reactions to what's happening.

We can make every day a nice day. Al-Anon's helpful leaflet "Just for Today" says it this way; "Just for Today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, keep my voice low, be courteous. I won't find fault." This is bound to brighten the day, for me and everybody I meet!

Today's Reminder
I will make up my mind to be cheerful every waking moment of this day. I will not expect too much; this will shield me from being annoyed at little things that don't go just the way I wanted them to. I will try to accomplish something specific, perhaps some chore I have long been putting off. I will wear a pleasant smile for everyone I meet today.

"What a comfortable feeling it gives me to realize that all I have to deal with is just this one day. It makes everything so much easier!"

[Taken and fashioned from "One Day At A Time In Al-Anon"
for general family relationships by Jim Hogue, MA, MFTI]

*Reading of Psalm 23 (Cute!!!)*

*August 30th*

When a family situation becomes really desperate, and we think we just can't go on another day living in uncertainty, fear, deprivation and general misery, we may decide to take action. That's good. But "what" action? So much depends on taking the right course. Let me consider:

Is my present frame of mind, whether of anger, bitterness or confusion, one in which I can make a wise choice? Have I yielded too quickly to advice from friends, well-meant, but based on only limited knowledge of all the factors?

Today's Reminder
If I have come to the end of my rope, I have lived in this turmoil for a long time. Let me be patient a little longer while I weigh the alternatives. Will a radical change really work out better for me, for my children, and yes, for my spouse?

Before I make a decision, or take a step, I will double my efforts to apply the truths and principles I am learning in emotional growth and parenting. It could bring me to an entirely different, more constructive solution than the drastic ones I was considering.

"Make sure that the medicine you use is worse than the sickness you're trying to cure!"

*August 29th*

How many of my frustrations and disappointments come from expecting too much! It is good to set our standards high, but only if we are prepared to accept, with comfortable serenity, results that fall short of what we expect.

We expect more of family, friends and coworkers, than they can sometimes deliver at their stages of emotional growth. At times we expect complete transformation, when it is we ourselves we should examine for transformation. In addition, and sometimes above all, we make too great demands on ourselves.

Today's Reminder
Let me learn to settle for less than I "wish" were possible, and be willing to accept it and appreciate it. I will not expect too much of anyone, not even of myself. Contentment comes from accepting gratefully the good that comes to us, and not from raging at life because it is not better. This wholesome attitude is by no means "resignation", but a realistic acceptance.

"What you have may seem small; you desire so much more. See children thrusting their hands into a narrow-necked jar, striving to pull out the sweets. If they fill the hand, they cannot pull it out and then they fall to tears. When they let go a few, they can draw out the rest. You, too, let your desire go; covet not to much ..." (Epictetus)

[Taken and fashioned from "One Day At A Time In Al-Anon"
for general family relationships by Jim Hogue, MA, MFTI]

*August 28th*

We are told there can be no progress without humility. This idea is confusing to many at first, and it almost always encounters a stubborn resistance in us. "What!" we say, "am I supposed to be a submissive "slave" to my situation and accept everything that comes, however humiliating?" No. True humility does not mean meek surrender to an ugly, destructive way of life. It means surrender to God's will, which is quite a different thing. Humility prepares us for the realization of God's will for us; it shows us the benefits we gain from doing away with self-will. We finally understand how this self-will has actually contributed to our distress.

Today's Reminder
The attitude of true humility confers dignity and grace on us, and strengthens us to take intelligent spiritual action in solving our problems.

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God . . . casting all your care upon Him, for He careth for you. He giveth grace to the humble."

[Taken and fashioned from "One Day At A Time In Al-Anon"
for general family relationships by Jim Hogue, MA, MFTI, 3-1]

*August 27th*

An interesting exercise, and one well worth a few moments of reflection, would be to consider the exact meaning of the phrase "to take offense."

These words describe an act of willingly taking into ourselves a hurt we feel somebody intended to inflict on us. We "take" offense. We don't have to take it. We are free to refuse to be hurt by a spiteful remark, or malicious action.

So the whole matter really rests with us. The choice of accepting or rejecting an offense is ours alone.

Today's Reminder
It may not be easy at first, but if I keep reminding myself that I will not permit myself to be hurt by what anyone says or does, it can bring about an amazing change in my attitude and disposition.

Whenever I feel I am being hurt by someone, I will silently refuse to "take offense" or take any action to retaliate. What a relief it will be to have such incidents vanish into thin air, leaving not a mark on me! I will not "accept" offense.

"What can words do to me unless I take them to heart?"

[Taken and fashioned from "One Day At A Time In Alinon" for general family relationships by Jim Hogue, MA, MFTI]